Adrifter II: Starfarer

Here it is beginning to end, I consider this to be my magnus opus.... so far anyway. I hope you enjoy it

Entry 1: Brief and permanent.
No, no, no
I was just outside
just outside
What could I have missed?
What could I have missed?
My love
dear love
Please wake up
just wake up
This isn't really happening
This isn't really happening

My willpower gone
leaning against a wall, her head in my lap
I can't even cry.

I stumble to the bridge
Though I fall, I feel no pain
my head is spinning

I wake up in my room
I don't remember walking here

She's gone forever ever isn't she?
Yes

Entry 2: The blurring of time.
I remember now
fixing the systems
and setting a course for home

staring out the windows
watching as the stars go by
Hours beget days
days beget weeks.

I feel not the passage of time
it is obscured by the pain.

the alarms stir me from my trance
how long were they sounding?

Entry 3: Space's cruelty
What did I do to deserve this?
Please, give me a sign
give me some sort of idea
how will I ever make it home With a dead ship?
Forget this forget you
still numb
my wavering spirit
could not bear another uphill battle
so I must leave this grave
how can I bear to abandon her in space?
a part of my heart died when I left
I will never get it back.
This black abyss is cruel.

Entry 4: Timelessness
There is no time here
no day or night
hours pass without notice
while I beg forgiveness for leaving her behind
I can no longer tell
if I am awake
or sleeping
draining fuel cells
all power to life support
let me drift
all
the
way
back
home

Entry 5: Adrifter
adrifter
is this my calling
so far out from home
I wish i was inside that ship

These stars are my only companions
and they all look the same

If ever I get home
will it truly be home?
without you there

and all I hear,
is the sound of you singing in my mind

blink once you're here
blink twice you're gone

My mind starts to quaver

is my heart still beating?
Is my blood still moving?
Is my pulse still marching?
am I still breathing?

Its hard not to be hopeless
when there is nothing to look forward to

I can't seem to stop listening to your singing in my mind

Entry 6: Remembrances, Contemplations and Suffocation.
I gaze out at the starlight
To think I would die surrounded by stars.....
To feel you near me again
I would give all the oxygen I have left
I feel this life is draining
draining out
I feel like I'm drowning in midair

I heard tell once
That the Hand of the Mighty
saved a man from the depths of the sea
Will the G-d who saved him save me?

The sleep over takes me
I can no longer breath

Entry 7: Homecoming
Day 1: Rescue.
from the edge of death
pulled back
to live again
and for what?
I would have died
I could have been by her side again

Oh holy God
you should have let me die

Entering Earth's orbit
I wonder what will happen next

Day 2:Unrequited Hero
never have I felt lonelier in a crowd
I can barely stand crushing silence of the white noise around me
Staring at someone in the mirror
They say it's me
I don't recognize the man
I died among the stars

I miss the quiet

I smile and shake hands
accept the praise
grin at cameras

empty gestures
I feel nothing

what life is worth living with no one to share it with?

gone so long from home
I do not recognize those I used to know

Staring at the mirror
I am lost in it's reflection
Who am I anymore?

Day 3: Suicide and Change.
I can barely stand the crushing
overwhelming
silence of this empty house

the quiet is louder than any noise

what I wouldn't give
that it was me instead of her.

she was perfect
I am a wretch of a man
why would she love someone like me

chocking back tears
change must begin

do I buy the gun
and pull the trigger?

do I buy the rope
and tie it around my neck?

do I buy the knife
and run it through my heart?

do I end it all?
is there hope?
do I end it all?

G-d please make up my mind
Gun in hand
My hand trembles

Is anyone out there listening?

do I pull the trigger?

german translation

Ich bin kein Interesse mehr an einen Glauben, dass die Linien hinter immaterielle Ursachen und Veränderungen im Lebensstil. Ich nicht mehr werden sich Menschen, die Spenden an wohltätige Organisationen, aber Spaziergang, vorbei an den Bettler, als ob er nicht existiert. Ich werde nicht mehr schweigen, wie meine Kollegen schreien, gegen die Misshandlung von Tieren, aber nichts tun, die Welt zu verändern Hunger-Krise. Die Bowery Mission in New York City folgt einer einfachen Philosophie, wenn es dient Lebensmittel, zuerst das Haus, dann die Straßen, auf diese Weise müssen wir uns selbst anwenden. Mit den Krisen, die unsere Welt, in der wir handeln müssen in eine konkrete Art und Weise.

Viel wirkungsvoller als schriftlich eine Überprüfung so einige andere Leute tun können, die Arbeit geht und die Arbeit selbst tun. Nun kann ich Liste von Statistiken und Fakten über all die Grausamkeiten auf einer täglichen Basis, aber Sie haben alle gehört, vor. Aber wenn Sie gar nichts tun, dann können Sie auch den Abzug betätigen Sie, wenn Sie sind nicht Teil der Lösung, werden Sie Teil des Problems.

Was mich betraf die Kindersoldaten im Kongo sind nur so viele Opfer von Joseph Kony der terroristischen der Tagesordnung, wie sie sind reich Minderheit Apathie. und das ist nur ein Beispiel.

Man könnte sagen, dass sie nicht in der Lage zu reisen, um die schrecklichen Teilen der Welt zu tun, und das ist OK, aber Sie sind in keiner Weise aus dem Schneider. Es gibt Menschen buchstäblich in Ihrer Stadt, die auf Ihre Hilfe angewiesen. Tun Sie etwas dagegen, etwas, die Lösung sein. Wenn dies etwas für Sie die Übergabe etwas Geld, dass Sie wahrscheinlich ohnehin gewohnt verpassen, dann haben Sie die Nummer vollständig. Wenn Sie gute Taten haben die größten Auswirkungen? Wenn sie eine tatsächliche Opfer.

Würde die Erlösung der Welt etwas zu bedeuten, wenn jemand Jesus nicht sterben, um für sie?

Dies ist nicht zu sagen, was für Ihr Geld ist falsch an und für sich, aber meiner Meinung nach, ist es sinnlos, wenn es nicht auch durch eine Art von Maßnahmen. In der gleichen Weise kurzfristig Mission Reisen sind bedeutungslos, es sei denn, Sie nehmen es als ein Stichwort zu leben, wie ein Diener 24 / 7 365. Ist mir egal, wie groß der ein Erlebnis, wenn Sie sich nicht ändern lassen Sie in gewisser Weise.

NICHT bete zu G-tt für die Änderung, die Sie nicht bereit sind, sich selbst zu tun, manchmal Sie sind die Antwort auf Ihre Gebete.

Etwas tun. Etwas wirkungsvoller, etwas Sinnvolles, tun Sie es heute tun es jeden Tag.

Adrifter I: Jonah

Here it is from start to finish, I hope you like it.

1-Running, Not Running to You, Running Away From You.
I am a wanted man
Wanted for some greater purpose
that feels thrust upon me
I do not want this, I do not want you
Leave me alone
Where can I run? Away, Surely.
I do not want to run to you
I will live my own life
On my own
I awake from a dream
Men were shouting "Throw him overboard, Throw him overboard!"
This means something
so, I will run to the shore
Leaving all I know behind
I will find a new life
Somewhere in the sea

2-Sitting by the Sea ( How Many Miles?)
How many heartaches till I find that one?
What is the meaning of our meeting?
Was it all just coincidence,
or was it just some sick joke played by the fates?
I think there's a greater purpose here.
G-d has a plan,
or at least I need to think so.
If not I think I'll go insane.
Though its not too bad, I've been there before.
Nice to visit, though I'd never live there.
Let's get together sometime,
we'll converse about what could be someday
but sometimes.... sometimes...
sometimes, I wonder though.
How many miles from one heart to another?
How many feet from soul to soul?
I think the distance is just too far.
I'll never make it.
I think I'll sit and stare at the ocean
and wait as the tide covers me
wondering about what could be .
I think I'm being dragged out to sea
But I don't care, I just hope one day,
I'll wash ashore, somewhere.
Somewhere,
somewhere closer to you.

3-This Silent Ocean, This Brilliant Sunlight
I'm drowning, drowning, in this sea
some invisible hand shoving my head under water
every time I try to catch a breath,
my arms flailing, legs kicking
attempting to tread water
treading water, this frozen, cold water
water, treading water, this cold water
My lungs fill up, I'm drowning now.
I cant see your face
I cant even see my limbs for the darkness of the ocean floor
content now with where I am. knowing where my hopw lies
I sleep, knowing that soon,
I will see the face of my maker
I will rejoice,
I was cold, but now am warm
Was drowning, but now can breath
was cold, but now I'm warm
In this sunlight, this brilliant sunlight.

*(interlude) Not Now (How I was Near Death/Plans for Me Yet)
not yet my child
though you are yet finished in this vast sea
your time to join me is not now
*the Adrifter coughs and gasps for air*

4-Adrifter
These waves have been my only companion
for days
bordering on insanity
choking on my own tongue
salt water is all i have to drink
sun scorching my skin
this driftwood i cling to
is all that is keeping me afloat
I once thought my journey done
as I sank to the ocean floor
but G-d had something for me yet
As I look around
i see
nothing but waves
for miles around me
I cling to some hope of land though these waters are large
and I am quite small.
tossed about in this ocean
the clouds darken and a chill sets in
My companions take on an evil tone
I feel a storm rolling in

5-The Storm, One for the Ages.
Dear G-d this storm is raging
I know I must weather it
but keep me safe
To be rescued from the depths only to die in this maelstrom
is not your plan
I have no idea how to save myself from this
but only though you
I am knocked back and forth
back and forth
One moment I am flying, the other drowning
where is the eye of this storm?
only for a moment my son
but now
I am sorry, but back into the hurricane you must go
Sweet reprieve, now gone
I cling only to myself and to You.

6-Purpose, Planning. Brought from The Sea, Into New Life.
wake up, wake my son, sweet Adrifter
you have reached land
now to the city you must go
Run! Run Quickly !
I will give you the strength you need.
I now have purpose, There is planning to be done, but I have purpose.
Sprinting for the city.
I now know what I must do.
I will be unstoppable
For I was thrown into the sea by my own doing
but now I was brought from from the deep
and through the storm
by The Hand Of G-d
Though there be rocks before me
I shall not fear.
If this what real life feels like
I want more.